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ANOTHER EGO BUILDING PAGE!



Well, it took awhile, but I have finally uploaded a few previously published pieces.
Writing has always been a catharsis for me and I began when I was fairly young. However, it wasn't until just a few years ago that I actually took my work seriously and submitted it for publication. Now I have two novels almost completed, several small published pieces and a full length magazine article published.
And suddenly, the writing bug has hit my whole family. My 13 year old daughter had her first poem published in 1997 (you can visit her page at Wild Palomino's Corral). My sister finished her Young Adult novel and is currently seeking a publisher (Frogspit's Pond) and my husband has had good reviews for his poetry on CompuServe (drop by his site at TVP).
I have a lot of fun writing my humour pieces and I want to thank Melanie Berry of Executive Baby for showcasing my work and for believing in me.
As with all writers, we need encouragement and constructive criticism and when I get this page done, I hope to have links to some resources for just that sort of thing. So please be patient and check back soon!



 

"The Alien"

Abodeaphobia. The newly identified fear of having an unexpected visitor when your house is a mess.

And let's face it gals, we've all been there. While apologizing profusely to our guest for the state of our home ("it's not usually like this") they politely tell us that they didn't come to see our house, they came to see us.

But as common as this is, I happen to know of a woman who has never suffered from this afflication. June arises at 5:30 every morning and goes for a long jog with her hubby. Upon returning to her abode, she makes herself look perfect, and then heads to the kitchen where she cooks a marvellous breakfast for her 7 (soon to be 8) offspring! Then she drives her children to preschool, elementary school, and junior high. The rest go with her to the gym where she teaches aerobics. All this, and her house stays immaculate.

I have proof. One day, I went to my client Shelly's home. After an attack of abodeaphobia upon my arrival, she began describing her neighbour, "the alien," that would never be caught with a messy home. I quickly assured her that her house could never be as bad as mine (why do we tell practical strangers about the state of our homes?, you'd never tell anyone you were wearing underwear with holes!). When, suddenly I realized she was talking about June!

Shelly had sent her daughter over to June's house for a very large birthday party. During which, June called to see if Shelly could bring over a bathing suite for her daughter. She grabbed the first one she could and was on June's doorstep in 30 seconds. Definitely no time for June to tidy up. When she got there, her face fell. June was entertaining 20 kids and there wasn't a thing out of place. Confirming, June really is an alien.

Definitely one of the Goddess types from Venus who had supernatural powers. Maybe she was even related to Samantha Stevens and could just twitch her nose. Whatever she is -- she can't be human. For like Shelly and myself, abodeaphobia is a disorder we will all have to live with. Between the car pools, piano lessons, ballet, baseball, meals to prepare, and work, the house is always the thing that sufers.

Abodeaphobia is definitely an earthling disease of the 90s. Kind of makes you wish you were an alien, eh?! (published Executive Baby, July/August 1996) ©1996



SURVEY SAYS...

No, I'm not Richard Dawson and this isn't Family Feud, although I think it could be! See, recently I read about a completed survey asking employees if they daydreamed at work. To my surprise, the overwhelming response was an enthusiastic "yes". Even more startling was that about half of those who admitted to daydreaming, often pictured themselves solving their company's biggest problem. Now as an employer, I'm delighted to see that even "off" the job, my employees are still working for me! But on the other hand, I have to wonder if I should be worried that constantly being on some other tangent might be dangerous.


The survey also claimed that 94% of those same employees believed that daydreaming promoted creativity. I couldn't help but laugh. Yet, when I shared this information with someone else, they quickly replied, "Oh yes, it's true! They even have major seminars about it. But it's not called daydreaming." "So what do they call it, Creative Visualization?" I asked. She didn't know. I'm not sure if it's creative or not, because as I read a little further into the survey, apparently 88% visualize quitting their job and becoming a success at something else. What happened to solving all the company's problems?!


This daydreaming phenomena can't be good. Eighty percent of men and a mere 51% of women fantasize about having sex with a co-worker. Now is that in the reproduction room or coffee room? This is really troublesome since I just get the shivers thinking of most of my staff, let alone fantasizing about them. O.k., I'll be honest; I do have one fantasy: There is this very cute guy in the mail room. He has a wonderful smile and a great sense of humour, not to mention great fitting jeans. My ultimate daydream would be that the next time he delivers my mail, he learn what a shower is for.


Now when I got the end of the survey, I discovered that only 46% of those surveyed felt that they did not accomplish what they set out to do that morning. While I would like to think that they just set their goals too high for the day, in reality I have to ask, "Is it any wonder? With all that daydreaming and fantasizing going on, who's actually doing the work?!"

1998 Bev Huston




LIFEWALK '98
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